it's touching moments like these that i have neglected in the past...
and I miss it ever so much now that it will never in this lifetime have a chance of happening again...
I was at the Singapore Sports School earlier this evening to cheer on my cousin at the Asian Youth Games. I was there to genuinely support him, whilst at the same time oogle at the sporty atheletic individuals on display. But the emotions and memories that came flooding out of me when I exited the stadium was entirely unexpected and unparalleled.
But first, who is my cousin?
Lionel Khoo- easily the most softspoken and gentle mummy's boy in the family, used to cry a ton when he was a child, bullied by many... okay bullied by cousin paul and myself =P...
the years soon passed and under the careful guidiance and nurturing by his ever watchful mummy and daddy, he has blossomed to be one of the brightest stars of today's local swimming scene.
Not many people know this but he is a really talented swimmer, one of the TOP boys in the Singapore Pool, having broke national records for the boys 50m, 100m, and 200m Breastrokes. What can i say, he is a BREAST man... =)
The swimming events that he's been competing in are for 17 year olds and yet he's excelled in every single one of them, reaching the finals today and on saturday 2mrw he will be in another final... and he's still 13 going on 14!
He was swimming against boys 4 years older than himself, taller, huger, seemingly faster too... but none of them were as hungry and strong willed as he was, and boy did he piledrive his way through the lenghty pool. He came in 3rd at the end of the 200m pummel, an outstanding feat considering that the first and second were 17 year old china kids who were standing at 1.94-2plus metres! and my cousin is only 1.79m!
But the moment that i was talking about... the one that really hit me home... triggering an influx of emotional bearings...
it just hit me in chords that i kind of forgot existed... those strings that were tucked in away at the far ends of my heart... locked up with keys thrown away...
well they all came gushing out... and it felt wretchedly amazing.
my cousin had just swum against all odds to beat the others and he got an Asian Youth Games Medal. his mum was so proud.. and his dad... ecstactically over the bloody moon.
he ran all the way down the steps to cheer for his son, and he ran all the way to the competitors washing down area to congratulate him. a superduperproudandhappy father he most certainly was.
the big unending gynormous smile on his face, and that radiance of happiness that followed and caught on to many others around the facility just reminded me so much of my own dad. and how much i miss him ever so.
Having your fathers present at defining moments of your life is one of the most blessed things in life that one can experience...
I remember...
ever so dearly...
the many different times that he's been there, just for me.
I mean unlike Lionel, who's atheletic and sporty, i was a fat kid who was a TOP Member @ Taf Club during my younger days.. so there weren't that many sports events for him to turn up to.
But the oldest memory i have of him being around was, rather ironically, a Sports event.
It was SPORTS DAY at st stephens school in 1994 and i was in Primary One.
I was the 2nd last runner of 4 runners at the Ball Relay Finals.
We came in Fourth out of Six teams..
that was to be my very last competitive sports event for a loooong time (cue 2007-cross country open - 1st place!)
and I miss it ever so much now that it will never in this lifetime have a chance of happening again...
I was at the Singapore Sports School earlier this evening to cheer on my cousin at the Asian Youth Games. I was there to genuinely support him, whilst at the same time oogle at the sporty atheletic individuals on display. But the emotions and memories that came flooding out of me when I exited the stadium was entirely unexpected and unparalleled.
But first, who is my cousin?
Lionel Khoo- easily the most softspoken and gentle mummy's boy in the family, used to cry a ton when he was a child, bullied by many... okay bullied by cousin paul and myself =P...
the years soon passed and under the careful guidiance and nurturing by his ever watchful mummy and daddy, he has blossomed to be one of the brightest stars of today's local swimming scene.
Not many people know this but he is a really talented swimmer, one of the TOP boys in the Singapore Pool, having broke national records for the boys 50m, 100m, and 200m Breastrokes. What can i say, he is a BREAST man... =)
The swimming events that he's been competing in are for 17 year olds and yet he's excelled in every single one of them, reaching the finals today and on saturday 2mrw he will be in another final... and he's still 13 going on 14!
He was swimming against boys 4 years older than himself, taller, huger, seemingly faster too... but none of them were as hungry and strong willed as he was, and boy did he piledrive his way through the lenghty pool. He came in 3rd at the end of the 200m pummel, an outstanding feat considering that the first and second were 17 year old china kids who were standing at 1.94-2plus metres! and my cousin is only 1.79m!
But the moment that i was talking about... the one that really hit me home... triggering an influx of emotional bearings...
it just hit me in chords that i kind of forgot existed... those strings that were tucked in away at the far ends of my heart... locked up with keys thrown away...
well they all came gushing out... and it felt wretchedly amazing.
my cousin had just swum against all odds to beat the others and he got an Asian Youth Games Medal. his mum was so proud.. and his dad... ecstactically over the bloody moon.
he ran all the way down the steps to cheer for his son, and he ran all the way to the competitors washing down area to congratulate him. a superduperproudandhappy father he most certainly was.
the big unending gynormous smile on his face, and that radiance of happiness that followed and caught on to many others around the facility just reminded me so much of my own dad. and how much i miss him ever so.
Having your fathers present at defining moments of your life is one of the most blessed things in life that one can experience...
I remember...
ever so dearly...
the many different times that he's been there, just for me.
I mean unlike Lionel, who's atheletic and sporty, i was a fat kid who was a TOP Member @ Taf Club during my younger days.. so there weren't that many sports events for him to turn up to.
But the oldest memory i have of him being around was, rather ironically, a Sports event.
It was SPORTS DAY at st stephens school in 1994 and i was in Primary One.
I was the 2nd last runner of 4 runners at the Ball Relay Finals.
We came in Fourth out of Six teams..
that was to be my very last competitive sports event for a loooong time (cue 2007-cross country open - 1st place!)
but i will always cherish that time... because he was there, cheering me on, screaming and shouting, and of course, as every father in his rather cliched demeanour does, he also recorded the moment on film.
he was there taking photographs on the trusty daddy cam. =)
i still have those old dusty photographs somewhere around...
there are of course, many other times when he was just there... not because it was a great event or there was good food, but because i was there... performing or whatever not... he was there for me.
and that's what fathers do. they go to crappy stupid events because they love their children and want to support them. to be the proud father of that kid who's on stage or on the field or in the pool or on the track. doesnt matter if the food isnt good or there arent any hot chicks around to stare at (of course it'll be a plus point la haha)
He was there when I performed in my very first drama production at the school's anniversary dinner. When I went up on stage to collect prizes on countless occasions =) haha (okay maybe three times) He attended events that my mum didnt wish to go to... He was just always there... and i love him with all my heart for that.
and this is where my memories of him culminates in... this very one song that rings true to the man in my heart.
my father has a plethora of songs attributed just to him... Elvis Presley's Fool's Rush In was his absolute favourite- his theme song so to speak.. everyone who knew him connected the song to him... friends, family, employees, the works. Vincent Ko= Elvis Presley Fool's Rush In... if you know the man and you heard the song, you would instantaneously think of my father... Curly Elvis Hair, Sideburns, Swagger and Style, striking an uncanny pose, with mic in hand...
WISEEEEE MAAANNN SAAYSSS...
But for me, the ONE song that triggers untold memories of him is none other than the one that was played on his 43rd birthday in 2002.
My dad, My stepmum, My stepdad, my mum, and myself... we were THAT amicable a family =)
We were at the TOP of the M @ Mandarin Hotel, one of the Top Restaurants in Singapore at the time and it featured stunningly exquisite French Cuisine.
But no, it wasn't the food that impressed me or anything gastronomic that caused this celebratory event to be embedded in my memory for life.
I still remember that moment very clearly, up till this day...
we were just finishing our dinner- nothing fantastic mind you, and the mood was just right... the lighting- dimmed down and fitting, the ambience- perfect, the floor- revolving with breathtaking sights of birdeye singapore and then came this trio of musicians who were making their rounds, with two acoustic guitars and a cello in hand.
And they played two songs for us...
But for me, the ONE song that triggers untold memories of him is none other than the one that was played on his 43rd birthday in 2002.
My dad, My stepmum, My stepdad, my mum, and myself... we were THAT amicable a family =)
We were at the TOP of the M @ Mandarin Hotel, one of the Top Restaurants in Singapore at the time and it featured stunningly exquisite French Cuisine.
But no, it wasn't the food that impressed me or anything gastronomic that caused this celebratory event to be embedded in my memory for life.
I still remember that moment very clearly, up till this day...
we were just finishing our dinner- nothing fantastic mind you, and the mood was just right... the lighting- dimmed down and fitting, the ambience- perfect, the floor- revolving with breathtaking sights of birdeye singapore and then came this trio of musicians who were making their rounds, with two acoustic guitars and a cello in hand.
And they played two songs for us...
now trust me when i say that i can't remember the other song... for some reason or another i just cannot... perhaps it's due to the fact that it was this other SONG that has taken full control and responsibility for the overall embededness of memory.
It was beautiful, it was touching, it was perfect.
the smile on his face when that song was sung, with the strings being strummed...
melancholically beautiful.
the lyrics just fell into place... and i can still recall myself rushing to the computer to download the song the moment i reached home.
but anyway yes, he was smiling...
and that is how i will always see and remember him...
a happy man.
and that is how i will always see and remember him...
a happy man.
even though he is not here... he will always be around.
for eternity.
don't ever neglect the people around you.
papa, i miss you ever so.
"Eternity"
Close your eyes so you don't fear them
They don't need to see you cry
I can't promise I will heal you
But if you want to I will try
I'll sing this somber serenade
The past is done
We've been betrayed
It's true
Someone said the truth will out
I believe without a doubt, in you
You were there for summer dreaming
And you gave me what I need
And I hope you find your freedom
For eternity...
For eternity
Yesterday when you were walking
We talked about your mum and dad
What they did that made you happy
What they did that made you sad
We sat and watched the sun go down
Picked a star before we lost the moon
Youth is wasted on the young
Before you know it's come and gone to soon
You were there for summer dreaming
And you gave me what I need
And I hope you find your freedom
For eternity...
For eternity
For eternity
I'll sing this somber serenade
The past is done
We've been betrayed
It's true
Youth is wasted on the young
Before you know it's come and gone to soon
You were there for summer dreaming
And you are a friend indeed
And I hope you find your freedom
For eternity
You were there for summer dreaming
And you are a friend indeed
And I know you'll find your freedom
Eventually
For eternity
For eternity
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